Heart of a Punk Soul of a Rasta

"Up, Guards and at 'Em!"



The Pigeon Detectives
Live at HMV Institute Birmingham
2nd April 2011

It's been a while since we saw The Pigeons last - a balmy May night at Cambridge Corn Exchange in 2008 to be precise. I went to Cambridge to show the kid where I went after I left school. Not to Cambridge University obviously, I'm the quintessential me, "I got only one Art O'level it did nothing for me". No, when I left school in '79 I went to Cambridge to see The Ramones at the Corn Exchange - nothing had changed (cough).

Anyway when it comes to The Pigeons my role is purely that of driver and general old bastard. Yes I can shut my eyes, listen to the guitar riff of "Done in Secret" and believe (and feel) like I'm listening to the Buzzcocks playing "Sixteen Again" but truth is I ain't. This is gig for the kid, but can I get him to write a bit for the FANZINE - can I bollo!

To the Birmingham Barfly then, sorry I mean HMV Institute - Library - a 600 punter venue which used to be the dirty downstairs piss-toir know as the Barfly. But now the turd has been buffed and polished and it's almost unrecognisable. They seem to have got rid of the all pervading smell from the Men's bogs as well. I kinda miss that. God knows how much HMV spent on the revamp, turd polishing don't come cheap you know. I bet the HMV accountants wished they'd left the poo pa unpolished now HMV's business is going down the shitter - but at least they'll have an asset to sell when the bailiffs come calling. Now can everyone stop talking about excrement!

Two supports tonight, first up to kick things off were "Club Smith" who were way outside my remit (neither HOAP or SOAR) and were quite frankly horrible - I think - Can't be sure how horrible because the sound in the Library was atrocious. The Heartbreaks next who we saw last year with Carl Barât. Having seen them before and therefore knowing what they were supposed to sound like I can confirm the sound at the Library really was PANTS with a capital P. The oldest trick in the book was in play - crank the support bands as loud as possible, so they're inaudible. And then pull it back for the main act so they sound fuc*ing immense. The Heartbreaks did their stuff and buggered off - I can't help feeling sorry for these Morecombe underdogs they have all the right intentions but seem to be swimming in porridge. For my money they need to spend a couple of weeks writing nothing but Rockabilly songs - in the Smiths style obviously - I think it would suit what they already have already and people might then latch on to what their about . It would be a case of kill or rebirth but at the moment it just looks like Heartbreak.

A short moment passed while Matt Bowman's crate of water was delivered to the stage and dropped in situ. The lights were killed, Bowman took up position A on the bass drum, the band began to play "I'm Not Gonna Take This" from album No.2 and finally The Pigeon Detectives were back.

If you hadn't received your copy of "Up, Guards and at 'Em!" several days early then you'd have been at a slight disadvantage, coz after a little bit of argy bargy correcting guitarist Oliver Main's amp The Pigeon's got stuck into the new material. "She Wants Me", "Lost", the gargantuan slow burner "What Can I Say?" which was for me the best of the set (playing now); the Cocks riff laden "Done in Secret" and the nearest thing to a ballad on "Guards", "Turn out the Lights". All the new stuff clicked into the set perfectly. Yep there's a bit of electronic percussion and a smidgeon of keyboards on "Up. Guards" and the production is a bit clean and slick but the percussion comes by way of New Order and the keyboards from Jimmy Destri, and The Pigeons still sound like the Pigeons, so all is well.

There was plenty of old stuff in the set for the young whipper snappers to bounce to too. "Romantic Type", "I Found Out", "I'm Not Sorry", "Take Her Back", "This Is an Emergency", "Keep on Your Dress" "Everybody Wants Me". Bowman flung himself off the bass drum drowned his hair with litre upon litre of water (which just makes him look like the bedraggled grandson of Robert Plant) and finally he stage dived reaching almost row P! After three years of drought there was fire & fury, we'd been fully reacquainted with all things Pigeon both live and recorded. Bowman plugged the new record by saying "go out and buy it on Monday because we need to get this shit out the charts". He's right but is anyone listening?

On the way to the gig we had to drive past the O2 Academy. JESSE J was "appearing" there. The queue from outside the venue snaked all the way down to the Pagoda at the Holloway Circus. Yes I know there will always be enough stupids in this world who want to gawp at a yellow dog. And yep we know Jesse J will soon melt away in the blinking of an eye and her entire career will take up residence on the shelves of the UK's charity shops. But today the stupids want Jesse J. They won't be able to remember her name let alone hum one of her tunes next month. But today they want the disposable, transient, nonentity Jesse J. So comrades it's Us versus THEM! Remember every non thinker that buys a Jesse J ticket is a TORY voter in the making. So "Up, Guards and at 'Em" THIS IS WAR!

Up, Guards And At 'Em!
The Pigeon Detectives
Released by Dance to the Radio
Digital CD
No Matrix

So what of the new album with its artwork that vaguely reminds me of the damnable marching hammers from Pink Floyds Wall? Well all you can ask of a band's third album is that is that it out trumps the second and "Up, Guards And At 'Em!" does just that. The songs are all strong and immediate and get straight under the skin and into the pores - The Pigeons are still The Pigeons even with the augmenting keyboards & electronic percussion. The only problem they have is over the next horizon, The Buzzcocks could only maintain the mono lyrical theme of love, life and relationships for three albums and I can't see how Pigeons can be any different. Next time round they will definately have a battle on their hands.



unedited poo pa