Heart of a Punk Soul of a Rasta

The Christmas No.1.

I went to my local convenience store today on the Newhampton Road, its convenient cos it's 200 yards from my house, not due to the price they charge for Gold Label. Anyway for some reason the businessman, entrepreneur, storekeeper and owner decided to engage me in conversation (fuck knows why he's only been teking me hard earned KA$H off me on a daily basis for eight years now). Whether it was my leather jacket being daubed with various punk motifs or whether he was conducting some kind of secret poll for Mori I don't know. But the capitalist guy asked me if I'd downloaded "Rage against the Machine" to stop Simon Cowell getting the Christmas No.1. He obviously thought he was pushing against an open door; I was forced to make him think again. I'll abridge my reply slightly, it went something like "I ain't got a computer, I don't give a toss and no thanks I don't need a receipt".

On the 200 yard drift home I thought to myself how lucky we are in the Communist free northern hemisphere WEST to have such a rich diversity of choice, Simon Cowell or Rage against the Machine, New Labour or Tory, Death or Glory, Catholic or Protestant, Fuckin Tinga or Fucking Tucker - ahhh its enough to make a clean cat shit on her own kittens!

It's unlike me to take action but I was backed into a corner, after a good Sunday afternoon session and a good Sunday afternoon sleep I waited until 7 O'clock then I turned on the old music centre and dropped the stylus fairly and squarely on what should be the Christmas No.1 in any free, democratic, sensible thinking, music loving, multi faith, secular society:

I left the 45 on repeat and fucked off down the Newhampton Inn for the evening, Merry Christmas everyone - I never did get a sticker.

Here's the single review from the NME just to prove that sometimes, simply by the laws of probability, they could get it right……….at least once anyway.

The pic is of Mick from when he appeared in episode 7546 of M*A*S*H. He of course played Klinger's long lost cross dressing brother (it ran in the family) - the scene with Mick and "Hot Lips" Houlihan unfortunately was deemed too raunchy for US TV - apparently though it can be found on YOUTUBE.