Heart of a Punk Soul of a Rasta

The epoch of the idiot.
HMV - Unlovable

I was in a record shop the other day, can't say which one; it was Swordfish in Birmingham. The geezer who owns the gaff and a punter who doesn't were in deep conversation. They were chewing over the news concerning HMV and their proposed axing of 60 stores nationwide. I earwigged in on their conversation. That's what I do. What they had to say was enlightening and I dare say pretty accurate, but let's forget about accuracy and enlightenment for a moment, because after all we are living in the epoch of the idiot.

Of course I've written already that HMV are going to axe 60 stores. But this is not exactly true because according to the HMV press release they actually "expect to EXIT from 60 stores across the UK". Exit, yeah that's it EXIT, not CLOSEDOWN, not SHUT - EXIT. It seems even today the words BOLLOCKS EMI & HMV are synonymous.

So don't believe that badge of mine, I've always hated HMV, they were always the FAT BASTARDS of the High Street back in the day, massively corporate and massively over priced. You see "I'm from Wolverhampton in case you couldn't tell" and back in the '70s these were the record shops I frequented - in order preference:

Sundown Records
- A proper record shop, sold tickets as well, I was on first names terms with them, they used to call me THAT DICK, and I loved it .
Goulds TV & Music
Ruby Red Records
Beatties Record Department
- With a mainly middle class, classical minded clientele, Beatties would shove stuff in the bargain bin after a week if it hadn't shifted. "Holidays in the Sun" pic sleeve for .25p - those were the days.
WH Smiths Record Department
- Convenient when buying "Sounds", "Melody Maker" or "NME".
Woolworths Record Department
- Good for nicking
Littlewoods Record Department
- Plastic record sleeves only
Time Machine
- Video & Second hand records
And
I'm sure I've missed some
HMV.
- Finally, the last resort, when all else had failed. And I never felt clean afterwards

So why are HMV having to shut (I mean EXIT) 60 stores?
Well aside from: the download, and the internet, and the supermarkets, and their failed diversification into electronics, and the fact they like Waterstones better; and putting aside the down turn in their profits for a moment, that's an easy question to answer. I realised the game was up for HMV the last time I went to one of their stores. It was about a year ago. I can't say which store it was, it was the one in Shrewsbury. They had twelve racks in the store. There was no vinyl, obviously, just CDs. But from those twelve racks HMV were only selling CDs out of two. The other ten racks were choc full of DVDs, games, magazines and books. A record shop selling MUSIC as a side line! Shit me, how did they miss that coming!