Heart of a Punk Soul of a Rasta

Hey Bigot - d'you know what.

What Ed?

John Cooper Clarke is out and about touring the nation currently. GO SEE. He came snaking through my neck of the parish in June. He was due to play Hereford with Don Letts.

Did JCC get to play Hereford's Blue Rooms? Or was it another gig at the Blue Rooms that didn't happen?

I dunno. I didn't go. I just wasn't emotionally strong enough to face the prospect of another terrible let down darling. I tried to see JCC at The Hay Literary Festival but unfortunately once again I missed out.

I thought you were barred from the Hay Literary Festival for crimes against Lit and certain book burning activities that we can't name here - Satanic Verses.

Sure I'm blacklisted from HAY but it doesn't stop me from trying. But the PIGS spotted as I made my way there. They nabbed me just a couple of miles away in the Black Mountains. I was mounting Lord Hereford's Knob at the time.

Police chopper was it.

No I think it was his side baton! (Ho Ho).



Yes the lack of some JCC in my life is now reaching critical point. I haven't seen the "Bard of Salford" since he backed up The Stranglers at the Roundhouse in 2007. Well when I say I haven't seen the "Bard of Salford" since then, perhaps I have. Perhaps I'm wrong. Perhaps I saw him just last month at The Factory Club in Manchester.

What? D'you mean in the crowd at The Fall gig.

No. On stage.

Eh? What? You mean JCC backed up The Fall; you didn't pissing well mention it in your review of the gig Ed.

No you don't understand. According to Ents24 "The UK's round-the-clock entertainment guide" (tee he) CLICK Mark E Smith is actually the "Bard of Salford". It states quite clearly in B&W on the ENTS site so it must be 100% unequivocally and incontrovertibly correct.:

The Fall

Seminal 80s band led by the inimitable Mark E Smith, 'Bard of Salford' and lyricist for the post-punk generation. Their music defies orthodox classification and Smith's lyrics challenge the audience with 'a return to an oral tradition that fashioned an ugly new set of features to graft over the similarly rancid roots of stone age rock'n'roll'


Well shit me! When did this all happen for Christ's sake? Cos as far as I'm fuckin concerned John Cooper Clarke has always been the "Bard of Salford"!

Hey Bigot stay calm mate I think………..

Has the internationally renowned Salford Bardship become a bleedin moveable beast? I mean feast. Is the Bardship a poetical baton to banded around milli vanilli! Is it no longer a badge of proud patronage given in perpetuity to the mighty Cooperman? What the hell is going on in this country!!!!!

Calm it Bigot! ENTS24 know jack shit! They've got it wrong. And that's why we love them. They're just like us - COMPLETE FUCK UPS!

John Cooper Clarke at The Robin Hood Bilston (capital of the Black Country) 30th Septmeber 2010 - be there!